BAD WORDS: Cussing Isn’t a Big Deal
Pastor Steven Osborne
Transcribed by PulpitAI (with edits)
Context of Discipleship
We are wrapping up our sermon series on Bad Words, and next Sunday we will start a brand new summer series. And the last several weeks we’ve said, kind of—we’re talking through this series not to put guilt and shame on people, but to really look at the words that are coming out of our mouth in the context of discipleship, because as disciples and as followers of Jesus Christ, we want to make sure that we are honoring God through our words. Now, that’s not always easy, and sometimes we mess up and praise the Lord for grace, right, but we want to continue to grow in this area to really become healthier disciples of Jesus Christ that represents Christ well and the church well. And so a definition for discipleship this morning:
Christian discipleship is the process by which individuals are guided and nurtured in their faith and spiritual growth within the Christian tradition. This involves learning to follow Jesus Christ more closely through study, prayer, and living out the teachings of the Bible. Discipleship is not merely about acquiring knowledge but is fundamentally about transformation and commitment to living a life that reflects Christian values and principles.
Now again, I have to say this, that it has to be Christ that is doing a deep work in our lives. That’s where the change is gonna happen, right? We can take in all kinds of information and knowledge, but at the end of the day, those are not the things that is gonna change us. It helps; we need that, but it is the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives that will transform us. A lot of these things we cannot do in our own power, right? Even the song that we were singing this morning, it is Christ in us that is doing the work and that will give us the wisdom and the power to be able to accomplish these things. And so, again, it is just that commitment to draw near to the Spirit, for the Holy Spirit to work in our lives, but don’t think for a second just doing good works—those are great, right? Or trying to white-knuckle it to say, “Let me behave, let me behave, let me behave,” it’s not gonna do it. That is a lot of energy. It has to be an encounter with the Holy Spirit in our lives that will do the work and that will help us.
Eugene Peterson and his reminder of discipleship, he says:
“Christian discipleship is a decision to walk in his ways steadily and firmly, and then finding that the way integrates all our interests, passions, and gifts, our human needs and internal aspirations. It is the way of life we were created for.”
And so again, a lot of times we think about our Christian life, and it’s easy to think, “Oh, I’m just gonna glorify, I’m just gonna be a disciple in Sunday morning in the church.” But this is in every aspect of our life where we’re seeking to be a disciple of Jesus Christ.
The Prevalence of Foul Language
Now, as we’re looking at bad language or bad words—going back to South Africa and just, again, big week this week for elections, profound consequences, and I was thinking about South African culture. You might not know this, but a braai, which is barbecue—and Americans get mocked in South Africa for your barbecue, right? Because here we’re used to gas barbecuing, some wieners, hamburgers, right? In South Africa, most of the time they don’t do it. It’s like steak and sausages, and it’s a big deal and a great time of fellowship and rugby. So sports and braai, big part of South African culture. Unfortunately, over the years, what has developed is a lot of drinking, with alcohol drinking—you know, some people would get drunk with the whole barbecue and a fellowship—and with that is just terrible language, right? Foul language. I’m not proud to say this about South Africa. I don’t even know where that kind of creeped in, and later on, we kind of would see that in South African movies in the same way that we have seen it in our American movies, right? It is really hard to find good, clean movies where there’s not crazy foul language. And obviously it does have an impact. I looked into just kind of that rating piece, how back in the sixties and stuff, I think the rating was, in the beginning, it was PG, and then it was R or X, but it wasn’t anything in between. The PG-13 wasn’t there. It later on actually came into existence. I believe it was Steven Spielberg through conversation that said, “Hey, we need to create a PG-13 piece.” And obviously if the world can see, “Hey, we need to warn parents about language use in a movie,” then we have to pay attention. If the world is saying, “Hey, this is not good. We don’t want to just expose kids to this language,” then we need to pay attention. And so unfortunately in these social events, a lot of times, you know, as you visit, and then there’s just really bad language. It’s like, man, why do we need this bad language?
And so, unfortunately, when we look at Romans 12:2, it says:
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, and pleasing, and perfect will.
But this is the hard piece for us—not to be conformed, right? There’s a pull and a challenge into our culture to say, “Let me just look like the world. It doesn’t matter for me to use bad language.” And suddenly, as Christians we think that hey, maybe it’s not a big deal because everyone is doing it. And so this morning I want to show you through scripture that it is a big deal, that we have to pay attention as followers of Jesus Christ to look at our language, to look at what is coming out of us, because again, it reflects what is actually going on in our heart. And so maybe there’s a deep work that needs to happen in our heart so that there’s healthier language that can come out of our mouth.
What the Bible Says
So what does scripture tell us and what can we learn this morning as we look at this topic? Colossians chapter 3 verse 8:
But now you must also rid yourself of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.
So it is not okay. I mean, there’s so many aspects—again, this morning is not about putting guilt and condemnation on you, but it is paying attention to say, “Hey, I want to grow in my love for Christ. I want to grow in my testimony and in my integrity. And so what does that look like? In which areas do I need to allow the Holy Spirit to work into my life?” And so saying anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from our lips. Obviously today in our age, we have social media, and it’s so easy to practice some of these bad habits on social media as well. So don’t think just because it’s maybe not coming off your lips, that it’s only on social media that some of these things are happening, that it’s okay. It is not. And so people are looking at your social media, they’re looking at the entirety of your life, and to say, “Man, are you truly living for Christ? Is the Holy Spirit truly living in your life? Are you actually believing the stuff that you are proclaiming, that you believe in scripture?”
Ephesians chapter 5 says:
Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk, or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.
Right? So a twist there. Just again, it’s like, hey, don’t let there be foolish talk and these rude jokes come out, but rather thanksgiving. All right, so it’s like, hey, we’re starting to see that scripture has a lot to say about this. It says:
Out of the same mouth comes praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.
I’m always amazed when I’m in South Africa, you know—and again, people know that I’m a pastor. And even back in my college days working in the mines. So it’s like the mining community, that’s a whole ‘nother level, right? And you got to be tough. And then, especially if they know you’re studying to be a pastor, it’s like, boy, I learned some language there, right? But it was interesting in some of those social events, even in the mines, it’s like, when there was maybe gatherings to eat, and they’re like, “Okay Steven, you’re studying to be a pastor. Will you pray?” It’s like, what does my prayer make a difference in this moment? You’ve been swearing like, you know, like crazy all day, and now you’re asking me to pray. And then we all look pretty spiritual there in the moment. It’s like, that’s just an act. That doesn’t mean anything. That’s just a religious act, right? This should be flowing through our lives and every aspect of our life, and to say we can’t be on a place where we’re praising God in one moment, and then when we leave here, we act like fools.
Titus chapter 2 says:
Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness, and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.
What if we can be on that place then to say, “This is my character. This is my testimony, my integrity. That people can look at my life and say, ‘We’ve got nothing against him.’ My language is clean,” right? And that should be true for all of us. And again, we grow into that discipleship. None of us just become angels when you give your life to Christ and where you’re just perfect. And even if you’re sitting here today and you don’t know Jesus Christ as your Savior, just know, right, that it is Jesus Christ that makes that difference in our lives. You’ll probably not be able to just change your language in your own power.
So Galatians chapter 5 then says:
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness…
And here’s our word that Christ showed us:
… and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
So when we look at our lives as believers in Christ, it is then our duty, it is our responsibility, to put to death the flesh, to say, “I cannot allow the flesh to come alive and to just act foolishly, to do whatever. No, there has to be some self-control that is happening in my life.” And again, I want to remind you that it is the fruit of the Spirit that brings that self-control.
A definition for us on self-control:
Self-control is the ability to regulate our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors in the face of temptations and impulses. It is about making choices that align with our values and God’s will, even when it’s difficult. Proverbs 25:28 says, “Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.” Without self-control, we are vulnerable to the enemy’s attack.
And so it is vital, it is important, for us to keep working on self-control in our lives. We can’t just allow the flesh to do whatever. When there is temptation—and there’s always temptation. Each one of us sitting here faces temptation, all kinds of different temptations every day, right? Jesus faced temptation, and he didn’t give in. And we have the help of the Holy Spirit in our lives to help us through some of those temptations so we don’t have to give in. We can show self-control. So as I reminded you this morning, it is part of the fruit of the Spirit in us.
So what can we do? How do we stay connected? It is regular prayer, Bible study, and worship keep us connected to God and sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s leading. John 15:5 reminds us, “I am the vine, you are the branches. If you remain in me, I am in you. And you will bear much fruit. Apart from me, you cannot do anything.” And so if you are struggling in some of these areas, right, it is to stay connected with the Lord, to be in fellowship, to be in his Word, to allow the Spirit to work in your life. But don’t think you can do this in your own power. You will not be able to.
The WHY
So consider this morning the “why.” Why should I pay attention to my words?
Well, because we want to reflect Christ well. What are people saying after you’ve been in conversation with them? Did you reflect Christ well in that moment?
You’re also setting an example. I shared with you before, it was a moment, Hailey was really small, and I had this intense phone conversation with T-Mobile about my bill, right? And so Hailey is like four years old. And again, I wasn’t swearing. I thought pretty godly example, but maybe a little intense godly example, right, with T-Mobile on the phone. And she reminds me every day—it’s like how many, 15 years or 14 years, whatever it is—of my intense, and then she’ll mock me. It’s like, you know, act. And so our kids pay attention. What type of example do you want to set?
I’m always amazed when I do go to Walmart. It doesn’t happen a lot. And I go now and again, especially it seems like in the evening. Then I’m amazed as you’re walking through some of the aisles the language that is happening, and a lot of times it’s like with the moms in front of their kids. And it’s like, what type of example are you setting, right? How can you use that type of language? What do you think… How is that gonna impact your kids one day?
And then just respecting others. We have to be reminded that we’re all created in the image of God. And we got to respect one another. And may our words reflect that as well.
How to Stop
So how do we stop this morning? Maybe you’re sitting here and you say, “Hey, I really got to work on this.”
First of all, I want to encourage you to confess and to repent. You got to know this morning that this is not from God. It is not pleasing to God. And so take time this morning to confess and to repent. Spend time, bring it before the Lord.
Become aware of your language. Start to pay attention. Listen to the words that are actually coming out of your mouth. I am not frustrated, but I’ve kind of dug my own grave with preaching on the whole thing on sarcasm, right? And so now Venessa and Hailey and the staff will constantly remind me, “Hey, remember your sermon,” right? And so, but now it’s like, hey, I’m becoming aware of my language and my sarcasm.
Permit people to correct you. This is not fun, and you kind of have to be humble. And so now again, Hailey and Venessa and the staff will call me out. It’s like, first of all, you want to react. But it’s like, “Okay, you’re right. I’ve got some work to do.” And it’s a good thing. We don’t want to become stagnant. We want to keep growing in all areas of our lives.
And then let’s work on praise. Are there these words of praise that are coming out of our mouth, right? Or is it all sarcasm? John Wesley, a famous Methodist pastor that founded the Methodist Church, he’s got several questions, self-examination questions. And here’s just several of them that he would ask himself and some of his disciples every day. He says:
Did the Bible live in me today?
Am I jealous, impure, critical, irritable, touchy, or disrespectful?
Is there anyone I fear, dislike, disown, criticize, hold resentment toward, or disregard? If so, what am I doing about it?
Don’t just rush through your day and not take the time to evaluate, to think through your day. How do you do that? How did your life impact people? How did your words impact? Is there areas that the Holy Spirit is calling you to to repent and to bring before Him?
